Five movie quotes

Well, what a shock. Silk didn't post that movie quote meme thingy. She has a lovely post about pre-chewed food instead. That's just a lil gross. So, I'm going to do this.

First five movie quotes that spring to mind. And they must be from five different movies.

Also, no character names or movie titles. You all get to guess which films they are from and which character or actor said them

1. I'm the Dude. So that's what you call me. That, or Duder. His Dudeness. Or El Duderino, if, you know, you're not into the whole brevity thing...

2. Fake a stomach cramp and when you're doubled over, moaning and wailing, just lick your palms. It's a little stupid and childish, but then so is high school.

3. Bear with me here. I just want to put you through this little exercise. Okay, now see this? This is a four way road, okay? And dead in the center, is a crisp, new, hundred dollar bill. Now at the end of each of the streets, are four people, okay? You following? Up here, we got a male-affectionate, easy-to-get-along-with, no political agenda lesbian. Okay? Now down here, we have a man-hating, angry-as-fuck, agenda-of-rage, bitter dyke. To this side, we got Santa Claus, right? And over to this side - the Easter Bunny. Which one’s going to get to the hundred dollar bill first?

- What is this supposed to prove?

- I’m serious. This is a serious exercise. It’s like an S.A.T. question. Which one’s going to get to the hundred dollar bill first - the male-friendly lesbian, the man-hating dyke, Santa Claus, or the Easter Bunny?

- The man-hating dyke.

- Good. Why?

- I don’t know.

- BECAUSE THESE OTHER THREE ARE FIGMENTS OF YOUR FUCKING IMAGINATION!

(Ok this one is two characters. So sue me. Name them both. And not the actors... the characters.)

4. Empire had the better ending: Luke gets his hand cut off, and finds out Vader's his father; Han gets frozen and taken away by Boba Fett. It ends on such a down note. And that's life-a series of down endings. All Jedi had was a bunch of Muppets.

5. Sicilians are great liars. The best in the world. I'm a Sicilian. And my old man was the world heavyweight champion of Sicilian liars. And from growin' up with him I learned the pantomime. Now there are seventeen different things a guy can do when he lies to give him away. A guy has seventeen pantomimes. A woman's got twenty, but a guy's got seventeen. And if you know 'em like ya know your own face, they beat lie detectors to hell. What we got here is a little game of show and tell. You don't wanna show me nothin'. But you're tellin' me everything. Now I know you know where they are. So tell me, before I do some damage you won't walk away from.

Looking forward to good guesses (hell just looking forward to comments).

Cheers
Jeff